Sunday, April 28, 2013

Surviving College

If you're in college or about to go to college, this one's for you. Here's a few shining pearls of advice to getting in and out of school alive.


-Potatoes and eggs are wonderful things. Cheap, yummy, filling, and easy. Heck, I even found a recipe involving both of them at the same time, and it was reeeally good.

-Ramen is a last resort measure. On the underside of a sheet of notes crammed in the margin kind of last resort measure. Just don't do it.

-Sleep is great. But if you have an opportunity to chill with folks instead, I'd chill with folks. I'll sleep when I'm dead.

-Don't play Slender. It's a creepy game involving you as a little kid running around in the woods with a flashlight while being stalked by the slender man, a tall, pale white dude in a suit that follows you around and eventually catches you. There's no way to win. It's pretty messed up.

-Couches become more and more awesome the older you get.

-Accept the fact that you're gonna be wrong as early as possible. You'll get hucked around by so many evil professors, weird people, and general stress that you can't afford to live under the illusion that you have it all under control.

-Ultimate frisbee is the best. Dodgeball is the best. Movie nights are the best. Free food is the best. It's all out there. Go do it. I know people who have contests for the first week of school with all of the open houses/opening socials and stuff to see how long you can go without eating any of your own food. If you play it right, you'll be stuffed all week, and you'll get several new t-shirts.

-Find somebody to talk to about stuff that's generally not fun to talk about. It helps a lot to have friends to emotional-dump with when you need it.

-Try new things. Within reason, (see the fourth item on the list) obviously, but don't be a stickler that doesn't want to do a pickle-eating contest because you think it's too weird.

-Get a good bike if you don't already have one. Cheap, calorie-burner, and easy to take care of. USU has a bike shop that you can take your bike to, and they'll show you how to fix it for free. It also lets you borrow a bike for free.

-Having fun does not equal spending money.

-If you want to pick something up, just go for it. I started playing guitar a year ago. I'm not a pro by any means, but I'm really glad I decided to do it. It's a great time-killer.

-Make a good resume as early as possible. It's like ripping off a band-aid, but worth it once you have it.

-Farts are funny.

-Don't freak out too badly about your first C on a paper or test. It'll happen.

-If you're going to school at USU, just know that half of the people you meet will be married already.

-On campus food is expensive. Buy only when necessary.


And finally, ladies and gents, there will be those that don't leave high school drama behind. Be gracious to them, but don't think you have to grovel to everyone. Find more friends that don't post pictures of their two-ton mayonnaise beef-wich on Facebook.