How to Make your Local Cashier Happy

I work part-time in a cafe funded by the university.
For the most part, it's a pretty good job. I'm on my feet the whole time, I don't smell like fast food when I'm done, and the students are nice.
Mostly.

Here's a few ways to really make your local cashier really happy.

-DON'T IGNORE THEM.
Whenever people come in to buy something, I ask them how they're doing. Most of the time people will respond. Sometimes they'll engage me in a short, lively conversation that makes us both feel better. But sometimes they do this:

How rude.
I honestly try to invest in every person that comes in, even if they're only getting some ice water. If you don't want to talk much, just give a couple of terse answers and I'll leave you alone. But for some reason a cashier is an alien or something that can't be associated with. It bums me out, and it makes you look like a jerk, so even if you're just super shy you could at least say:
I'm good.
And pay me, and walk out.

-Don't shoot the messenger!
Things happen. Prices change, managers switch regular daily deals, equipment breaks down. It's up to me to notify management of any problems, but beyond that I can't magically fix the soda machine. I don't have the qualifications, the tools, or the permission to fix it. I'm sorry, I truly am, but please just go talk to management if you're really that upset about your diet coke being gone.

-Use your brain.
I don't know why this is an issue, but sometimes people blatantly ignore signs that say something isn't ready. I've had people come in, see the sign that says
CORN DOGS ARE NOT READY.
And they reach around the sign and grab a corn dog.
They buy it, leave, and come back later complaining that it's frozen. With several teeth marks in it that make it look like they let a beaver go at it.
So we have a new procedure.
We ask them where they got it.
If they say:
"Behind the not ready sign."
Then it's their own dang fault and NO REFUND.
I can't magically un-freeze things either. I'm just a 20 year old college student working at minimum wage to pay rent and sell you corn dogs

-Unfold your money.
This should be a no-brainer, but it really ruins my day to have somebody grab a soggy dollar bill that's been smashed in his back pocket all day to pay for his corn dog.
Here's why:

1. It's disgusting.

2. I have to unfold it and put it away, which can take a while depending on how rumpled it is.

3. If it's soggy...and it's been in your back pocket...then, well, butt-sweat.

I don't want to touch your butt-sweat. I might put on a latex glove to handle your butt-sweat. I am well within company policy to wear gloves while handling money, and if it teaches you something in the process, then good. I won't be snarky about it, because it's never my job to be rude or annoyed with a customer, but hopefully you'll catch the hint. Hopefully.

I hope this has been food for thought. Like I said, 90% of the people I see everyday are really nice to talk to and serve. There's just a few bad eggs that kind of make working miserable sometimes. Please don't be that guy.

Be nice. Be happy. Love on a cashier near you.